All week long, I have been dealing with the effects of aging. I have noticed that as I read and as I work, that I am squinting more….things are blurrier than I am used to. My eyes have grown so weary so quickly. I love nothing better than sitting down with a nice cup of tea and a book…losing myself between the pages….throwing myself full-force into the lives of the characters. This past week, I would read until the letters started blurring together and then put the book down….go on Facebook long enough to make a comment or three and then wait for alerts to buzz. After I put my old friend back onto the bookshelf (and yes, to me, they become old friends) I make my way to the woods.
Thursday night was the night of the New Moon. I had anticipated my time in the woods all day long. I was excited because this was the night that I would be consecrating a wand that I made for a friend and my staff. I have been working diligently on both for a few months now. I had packed my altar materials in my old canvas backpack along with the wand. I walked leaning on my staff…the first of many trips it would be taking with me.
This trip to the woods would be made without my trusty little blue chihuahua. I needed to be able to concentrate fully on what I was doing. As I entered the edge of the woods, I heard that all too familiar caw. To most, it would seem harsh and crass. I have come to see it as a rough and raw melody. I looked up and watched as Mama Crow flew above…I don’t think I had ever noticed how gracefully she winged her way from tree to tree and post to post.
I disappeared into the wooded grove and settled in amongst the trees and leaves and rocks that have become more than acquaintances lately…more like friends that I have known since the beginning of time. It is true that the earth has its own spirit…its own heartbeat. You can feel it in every part of it you touch. I squatted down (not too gracefully) underneath a large maple. I unpacked my candles and skulls and the wand. I leaned my staff against this magnificent tree. I knew that the energy from that tree would encircle and move within and around my staff. I sat down cross-legged in front of it all and I started to breathe. Just breathe.
I closed my eyes. It felt good to rest them. I invited the elements and the directions. I called to Morrigan and to Cernunnos. I held the wand up under the moon. I whispered to her for her energy and her power to move from one end of the wand to the other. I whispered another invitation for the energies to combine for my staff. I felt the New Moon’s energy pouring over me. I quieted my own spirit and just listened. With my eyes closed, I could see stories that the moon had hungered to tell me. I watched as colors swirled around inside of my closed eyelids. It reminded me of sitting at the feet of my granny when I was a young’un.
As I sat there lost in the story-telling of the moon, I felt something brush against me. Now, when you are by yourself in the woods and and it has just started getting dark, your mind goes to everything from snake to rat to skunk. Just as I was preparing to sprint back to the condo, I heard a small little purring sound and felt something making biscuits in my lap. I opened my eyes to see that little squirt of a calico kitten getting comfortable on me. I could almost hear my granny cackling out loud about how a kitten could scare the Be-Jesus out of a big old fella.
After I had calmed down again and my breathing had slowed, I looked up through the trees. There was a breeze rustling through the tops…you could feel the rhythm building…the music that comes when the earth and the heavens meet. I stared at the moon and the stars and quietly whispered my favorite quote, “I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.” Once again I could feel my dear friend pouring her light and energy down into the small circle. I watched as the opal aura on the wand caught its light and danced with its energy. The more I heard the purrs coming from my lap, the more I relaxed back into the energy of the earth.
I could feel my spirit familiars there with me….Crow and Wolf. I could sense their protection and their magick. I closed my eyes again and listened. Just listened. I listened with my spirit….with my heart….to the stories of when all the elements began…when the moon began to pour herself over the earth. I listened to the stories of when Wolf and Crow came to be. I knew that something wonderful and brand new was happening here…..something that I am probably not describing as best as I could here….but something that would completely and magickally intertwine with my spirit. For the first time in so so long….I felt completely lost in the magick of the worlds and energies and spirits around me…..so completely bathed in a power that I could never harness or control. I felt a part of the universe that I honestly believe that I haven’t tapped into yet. It was a time for me when all that I worshiped and all that I held dear melded into one energy. This energy poured itself onto me and my staff and the wand and this sleeping kitten.
I felt like I had been in the woods for days, but had only been there a couple of hours. It was the feeling that Ebenezer Scrooge must have felt after the visits of the three spirits….it was hard to fathom that all that took place did so in that small amount of time. I scooped up the kitten and held her in one arm as I packed everything up. She yawned and stretched as she just sort of laid there hanging across my arm. As I started off, I put her on the ground and she slowly walked out of the woods. I now know which condo she lives in and that her name is Beatrice. Her mom met me at the gate of her unit and laughed and said, “She sure does like to explore!” I responded with, “She sure does.” and looked down to see if the little booger had looked up to wink at me. The things that little one has experienced just in the few short months she has been around.
I slept like a rock that night. The dreams I had were vivid. I dreamed about the outdoors and fae and many many friends. All I remember thinking as I crawled out of bed that morning was, “I need more nights like I had last night!”