I think alot of times that we forget the power that comes with words spoken. Whether those words are spoken in anger, intimacy, or indifference, we forget that once those words are released, they can’t be pulled back or forgotten. They leave a permanent brand…much the way a tattoo would leave an indelible imprint.
I have felt that power many times this week, both good and bad. I have also unleashed that power….both good and bad. That power has been both invigorating and deflating. Learn to get past it…..yes, I know that. It still does not dull the sting. Why does it seem sometimes as though the harsh words have so much more power?
I have lived my life with one philosophy in mind…always live simply and honestly. It wasn’t until today that something really crept into my heart and took residence. A friend asked my advice. Before I could actually think, the words came to me, “Honesty with temperance.” Those three words have ruminated my heart and mind all afternoon. Honesty…it is required with ourselves and with others. Temperance….without it, even the most heartfelt thoughts can seem harsh or meaningless.
I have cooked since I was a teenager. I was taught the value of tempering in recipes. When mixing eggs with hot liquids, if not introduced slowly and patiently, creates nothing more than a scrambled mess. If done correctly and with thought, you get a golden creamy liquid that creates all kinds of yummy products. Chocolate, if not tempered correctly with cream, becomes a clumpy, chunky glob, but if it is done right, it becomes a shiny glossy silky encasement for truffles or a dark, soothing coating for cake. The secret is in how the secondary ingredients are added.
I have dealt with weight issues since I was a child. A loving mother was always the buffer between me and cruelty. Imagine the hurt I felt the first time I actually found out that I was “fat.” Still today, if I hear that word, it makes me cringe….but then again, I will use it to refer to myself. I have still thrown it carelessly into the wind to be written into my heart.
I even think about the way I address my pets. I never should tell them that they are bad. They only need to know that they are behaving badly. They are never “stupid.” Most times they are so much smarter than I. I should always tell them how cute they are or how crafty I think they are. We are the ones who create ill-disciplined and rebellious pets. When they are entrusted to us, they are a blank canvas waiting for us to make masterpieces. I promise, too, that no pet poops gold bars. Ask me about this on a day after they have been way smarter than I am and I am frustrated. They live life in the moment. They simply are.
The same thing may be said for building ourselves up to others. It does me no good to try to make myself look more important in someone elses eyes. What happens when the truth finally comes to light?? I have defeated the purpose of what I started out to do. Believe it or not, no matter how dull or boring you may think you are without all the bells and whistles…..you are absolutely fascinating to someone. Don’t try to list your accomplishments with me…I will probably tune you out anyway. Show me the heart that was created by the energies of the universe, and I promise I will be enthralled.
Do you find yourself haunted by certain words or phrases that were spat out at you in anger or indifference? Think along with me right now about who you really are. I was raised on a farm. I have stepped in alot of poop in my life, but there are some amazing things that I have seen and done. Those things don’t make me who I am….neither do other peoples words.
Before Christmas, I sat on the patio during a cold spell one morning with my coffee. I breathed the names of each of my dear friends into that brisk air. I saw their faces in each puff of smoke. I breathed blessings. It refreshed me. I could feel them breathing with me….the energy those words created was phenomenal. I have friends whose energy just makes me smile. I hold that in a part of my heart that I bring out on dark days.
So….what are my words, you may ask. I am simple. I am loving. I am gentle. I am generous. I am wise.
What are your words for yourself today?