Never let another person take away who you are. You have so much strength, power. You allow it to be taken away, it’s not taken from you. YOU allow it. Pull it back in. Take CONTROL. You are a warrior. You are in control. Things don’t happen to you, you ALLOW it to happen. YOU are a WITCH. You have the power of the GODDESS in you. DO NOT allow it to be taken away.
This was something that a dear, dear friend of mine said to me this week as I sat in the midst of a gigantic pity party I was having. I had allowed something that someone said to me in anger wipe away all memory of who I truly was. I allowed feelings that had not interrupted my brain for years to come flooding back into me like a tidal wave. I let every ounce of self-doubt smack me up-side the head. I didn’t think that I was that fragile….but my self-esteem shattered like a mirror that had been hit with a sledge hammer.
It took the strong words of a dear friend to help me to realize that I am stronger than mere words. I was answering accusations with pure, raw emotion. I had to be reminded that there is more to me than emotions that can be shattered at the drop of a hat…..hell, I have been through my own sexual abuse, the death of a partner and countless other crises that made this one seem almost insignificant. How did I originally respond? I pissed and moaned and felt sorry for myself. I pouted and sulked. I forgot what and who I was.
For a while, I was having trouble finding myself in the middle of a crisis. What did it take to help me find my way out? It took loving words lined with just enough “swift kick in the ass” in it. I had forgotten that I am a witch and that I have something to work with that can make all the difference in the world. I have Magick!
I settled in to make some Witches Salt. I scraped the bottom of my cauldron with a spoon and combined it in my mortar and pestle with some black lava salt and ground it into a fine powder. It was time to banish some negativity. I needed to get rid of negative emotions, negative self-talk….I needed calm, peace and my sanity back. I lit the candles, opened the circle and then proceeded to put the Witches Salt everywhere that it needed to be. After the ritual, I thanked the elements and closed the circle.
I slowly walked down to the pond…..that is the one place where I feel completely me and completely magickal. Friz walked leisurely by my side. I looked down at him and I saw the hair on the back of his neck begin to bristle up. He saw something that he didn’t recognize and he started barking uncontrollably. I tried to quiet him down, but he continued to bark. No matter how hard I tried, I could not get him to calm down.
A thought raced through my mind. “A chihuahua is going to be a chihuahua, no matter what.” Little did I know that was what my dear friend was trying to get through my thick skull. “A witch is a witch, no matter what.” I have an obligation to myself and to the Lord and Lady. I am to be the strongest, best me that I can be….no compromise….no faltering. I have all the strength and power of the wild God…..the stamina of the Horned One. I also carry the strength of the Warrior Goddess….the power over those things that would try to conquer me.
I need to show myself for who I truly am. I have the power of generations of Ancients surrounding me and inside me. I only have to access that power. It is as easy as lighting a fire in my cauldron. As I made myself comfortable by the pond, the herd of cats came padding toward me. Again, I am reminded….I have to be who I was created to be. The only reason that flame can be snuffed out, is if I allow it. I must stand guard over that flame.
My favorite quote from the first Harry Potter movie will suffice. “You’re a wizard, Harry…..and a thumpin’ good one, I’d waiger.” Yes, I am a wizard, witch, sorcerer, magician…..whatever word you want to use. It is just a matter of semantics. It is my choice as to how good, bad, weak, or strong. From now on…..I choose strong.