This has been a full weekend. All Last week, I was confined to my desk at home because of a snow and ice storm. We got mostly ice here. It was definitely an adventure every time I would take the dogs out to pee. You see, I am not particularly graceful when it comes to winter weather….that is why I live in the south. Even with the addition of Yaktrax (a gripping system that attaches to your shoes), I am still not graceful when winter weather hits. It doesn’t come from not being cautious…I move around like one of the hippos from Disney’s “Fantasia.” I elected to stay inside by the heater. I only fell once…the chihuahua always thinks I am playing and takes the opportunity to play trampoline on my more-than-bouncy belly that is pointed up in the air.
By the end of the week, cabin fever had set in and I was begging the elements to please give me weather that I could go out and explore in. Yesterday, Saturday, was spent running errands and getting everything accomplished that I couldn’t do during the week. It was also the day to take care of the animals regular needs….brushing, nail trims, baths…..all that wonderful stuff they hate and react to like a scene from “The Exorcist. I am sure that because of the screams and screeches that come from the courtyard, our neighbors are sure we abuse them….needless to say, this is before they are even touched with the nail clippers. I really do wish that there was a way to accomplish this magickally. It’s always such a battle…..and of course, I am pouted at for the rest of the day.
My partner and I went out last night to celebrate Valentine’s Day at a local Italian restaurant. After a lovely meal of pasta, wine, and cannoli…we drove back to the condo and took a short walk around the complex with Mama Moon smiling down on us the whole time. I took this time to whisper blessings over us, our families and our friends. Mama Moon was shining so brightly that it felt as though she was smiling down over us.
Before bed last night, I applied some flying ointment to my temples and let myself drift off to that place that stays hidden between sleep and awake. It is in that place that I was treated to a vision of a lush green forest. In that forest were Wolf and Crow. They were in a playful mood. I watched and laughed as they played chase. I sat down on the closest stump and watched as little sparkles of light glimmered around me. I opened my arms and absorbed that energy. I woke up this morning feeling like I had played and romped and ran all night long….but by now Friz had forgiven me for the travesties of yesterday and he was ready for a trek to the woods.
As we walked, I looked up because I heard a sound that isn’t a regular one among our winged friends here in the condo complex. I knew the sound….I had heard it plenty coming from the fields back home growing up. It was the sound of a hawk hunting for its morning meal. That sound of ‘screeee, screeee’ is unmistakable. I have heard way too many stories of small dogs being the target of the birds, so I picked up Friz and hid him under my cloak. It was only moments later that I heard an even more familiar sound. It was the sound of the crow…..but this sound came in symphony….not just one crow. I looked up and saw many many crows criss-crossing in front of the hawk. They weren’t making happy sounds…more of an aggravated announcement that the intruder was not welcome. All I have to say is that Friz better be glad that Mama Crow has got his back.
I remember from the teachings of my grandmother that crows are the messenger from the spiritual realm and that Crow is the guardian of magick and that Wolf is the teacher of the magick (or medicine). As I walked toward the woods, I could feel something stirring inside of me. It is that feeling that you have when you don’t really know whether to laugh or to cry. It is neither a bad or a good feeling, but a feeling where you feel like you are at an in-between place.
As I sit down in the leaf strewn floor of the woods and place everything in its place on my earth-made altar, I am overtaken with feelings as I hold the skulls of Wolf and Crow and place them on top of the leaves. My mind unites with my spirit and I am transported to that place between sleep and awake again. I see Crow and Wolf play-chasing and dancing through that glimmering forest. It becomes evident to me that the glimmering light is the magick which Crow has brought to me. Sitting there with my arms outspread was me absorbing that magick which was taught and embedded into my spirit by Wolf.
As I sit there with my eyes closed, I reach out my hand. It is as if I can cup it and feel the magick filling it. I feel the warmth of that magick as it radiates against my cheek. As I sit there in the midst of the vision of magick, I feel the warmth of springtime radiating through me. Though the air was brisk, this morning…there was a warmth surrounding me that welled up from the earth to my body. In what seemed like one big raw emotion, I felt joy and hope and fear and anger. I felt fear….that what we may doing to the Earth Mother may be irreparable. I felt anger….that we had stripped her and raped her and left parts of her exposed and dying. I felt hope….knowing that she has lasted longer than any human…that she was constantly changing and adapting and creating. I felt joy….that she is thriving, moving, breathing, and that she is more knowledgeable and magickal than anything we could ever hope for.
I called to Crow and Wolf. I asked Mama Crow, if she saw me worthy, to continue to bring the magick to me….to continue to change me. I asked Wolf to continue to teach me…show me how I may affect change around me. In that moment, quiet overtook those woods. I listened closely and once again, I could hear a beat. This time it wasn’t just the heartbeat of the Earth Mother alone…but mine alongside hers…beating in harmony.